Why DID The Chicken Cross The Road???

GEORGE W. BUSH
We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just
want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The
chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle
ground here.

AL GORE
I invented the chicken. I invented the road. Therefore, the
chicken crossing the road represented the application of these two
different functions of government in a new, reinvented way designed to
bring greater services to the American people.

COLIN POWELL
Now at the left of the screen, you clearly see the satelliteimage
of the chicken crossing the road.

HANZ BLIX
We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet
been allowed access to the other side of the road.

MOHAMMED SAEED AL-SAHHAF (Iraqi Infromation Minister)
The chicken did not cross the road. This is a complete
fabrication. We don't even have a chicken.

SADDAM HUSSEIN
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite
justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

RALPH NADER
The chicken's habitat on the original side of the road had been
polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not
reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it
was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.

PAT BUCHANAN
To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.

RUSH LIMBAUGH
I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it
was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet
someone out there is already forming a support group to help chickens
with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more
of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for
by their tax dollars, and when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about
your money, money the government took from you to build roads for
chickens to cross.


DR. SEUSS
Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes,
The chicken crossed the road, But why it crossed, I've not been
told!

ERNEST HEMINGWAY
To die. In the rain. Alone.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads
without having their motives called into question.

GRANDPA
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good
enough for us.

BARBARA WALTERS
Isn't that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to
the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of how
it experienced a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish
its life-long dream of crossing the road.

JOHN LENNON
Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.

ARISTOTLE
It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.

KARL MARX
It was a historical inevitability.

VOLTAIRE
I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend to
the death its right to do it.

RONALD REAGAN
What chicken?

CAPTAIN KIRK
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

FOX MULDER
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more
chickens have to cross before you believe it?

SIGMUND FREUD
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed
the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES
I have just released eChicken 2003, which will not only cross
roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance
your checkbook - and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of
eChicken.

ALBERT EINSTEIN
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move
beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by
chicken? Could you define chicken, please?

COLONEL SANDERS
I missed one?